I know that similar questions were posted earlier (including mine) and Beewang might lecture me again but you see Bee, my questions are slightly different each time

The pictures are at: www.gregguzik.com/bmw
My story is as follows: I picked up my car from a dealer on Oct 10. I wanted to do a walk-through and have the dealer sign a list of any damages I may find but he refused (saying that his only responsibility that's left is to give me the keys).
As I had expected, I noticed several scratches in the following few days as shown on the pictures:
- front bumper - multiple scratches underneath and many small ones from rocks in front
- driver's door - 3 scratches along the edge
- right front wheel - deep scratches on the rim
None of these damages were noted at a drop-off (the walkthrough of the lady there was less than 30 seconds).
BMWNA instructed my dealer how to file a claim so I went to see him again. He noted that the front bumper probably will not be fixed because the scratches underneath are my negligence and the scratches from rocks is wear-and-tear. Moreover, their technician didn't notice them when they received the car but the dealer was not very strong with this opinion. He said that the wheel rim can be fixed without replacement and he will file a claim as he was instructed by BMWNA.
So, today I went to a reputable, BMW authorized Body Shop. Their estimation for fixing all of these is almost $1600 (front bumper replacement, wheel rim replacement, door edge fix).
So, I have now a few questions:
- should I contact the dealer with this estimate or deal directly with BMWNA?
- which of these damages should be fixed under the insurance?
- would you recommend doing the fixes to the front bumper and the door? Is it better to have original parts with a few scratches or new/repainted with no scratches? New bumper would be painted in the shop and finished to match the car. The door would require removing from the car, removing the mirror and the knob to refinish the edge and put a clear coat on the whole door surface. It seems like an overkill for 3 scratches on the edge...
- probably it's a long shot but is there any way to have the repair cost paid to me without fixing? My reason is this: with time the door and front bumper will probably get more scratches, so it would be better (for me) to replace/refinish the parts later than now.
- what do you think about this manufacturer defect on the trunk (last picture)?
So sorry for a long post... Maybe I'm being too particular about my car
